Parenting on a Saturday

I had plans for today.
But we have kids.

I have been awake since 7am,
out of bed since 8am.

Unshowered I have
negotiated backyard wars,
replanted vegetable dreams,
requested quietness and calm,
and dreamed of coffee.

Finally we are having breakfast.
home made pancakes.
The kids are calmed,
they’re playing nice.

Finally – Nirvana.

For now.


Jelly is not a Breakfast Food

Master Jai was lucky enough to have blue jelly and a packet-meringue for dessert last night. 

In true kid-style, he mashed it up into a swirling mass that was barely recognisable.

Then he requested some custard, made for us adults, be added.

Oh dear. Now it looked like a snotty mess.

Despite the appearance, he still ate it.

This morning, the moment he walked into the kitchen, asked this question:

“Can I have jelly for breakfast?!

Sigh. “No dude, Jelly is NOT a breakfast food.”

Jai thinks he is so smart: He stepped outside, into the cold air, stepped back in and said “I need jelly to cool me down!!”

It’s gonna be a long day.


Marshmallows are NOT for Breakfast!

[This happened at 7.30am this morning!]

I hobbled towards lounge-room looking for Jai. Found him pushing his dining-chair down the hallway.

Me: “Where you going with that?”

Jai: “Somewhere.”

Me: “What do you want?”

Jai: “Marshmallows.”

Dear gawd. Every morning. Yet again.

Me: “Buddy, seriously, again, they are a special food, not a breakfast. Mummy hid them because you keep stealing them!”


I swear I saw a little man with a blue face wearing a kilt materialise beside him.

Me: “Then know your limits.

Jai: “I HAVE NO LIMITS!” Yep, he just said that.

Me: “Well, the marshmallows do.

Somehow I distracted him from the location they are hidden.